ten things to keep in mind.

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1) be you for you.

i always read these cheesy quotes on tumblr telling you to be you because ‘everyone else is taken.’ quite frankly, i don’t like any of these quotes because they’re just words being thrown at you- they mean nothing to me because i hear those words all of the time. over the years i’ve begun to realize why i need to do things for me and not for others. here’s what i’ve found to be true: no matter who you are, someone will always dislike you. that’s a fact. it is impossible for everyone on the planet earth to be in agreement about something. want to give away houses to the homeless? some people will disagree that they need to work for things and not be given them as a charity cause. you want to fill in your eyebrows because that’s what you want to do? someone will think it’s stupid or dumb or that you’re trying too hard. not everyone can always be pleased and thats a hard lesson for some people to learn. in the end, if you’re doing all these things to ‘fit in’ with others and you’re doing it just to be accepted, stop. why should you be unhappy doing something for others when you could still get ridiculed for it? cut your hair crazy short or dye it pink if it makes you happy. no matter what you do, someone will always have a  problem with it, so you might as well be happy than not while doing it.

2) if you never try, you’ll never know.

a lot of times, i didn’t want to try things. to try foods because they looked weird, to try a ride at an amusement park because it looked intimidating; i was practically reading a book by its cover for so many things, and i was missing out on it all too. since i’ve been on exchange i have started to try new, sometimes weird things. i’ve gone on ferris wheels even though i am afraid it’ll break, i’ve tried upside down roller coasters and eaten rabbit. although i was scared, i still had a blast in the end and it was a lot better than sitting on the sides watching other people have fun. if you’re safe and with the right people, try to try something new.

3) say ‘yes’ more.

i often said no to a lot of things so i could sit inside and scroll endlessly through instagram or facebook, sitting inside in my own little bubble of the internet. i soon began tot realize that i was missing out on a lot of things, they may not have been the biggest thing but when you hear laughing downstairs, hearing the joke the second time isn’t the same as the first. i began to go places more- to the grocery store, to drop the car off at the mechanic, to watch my sister at the barn, visit a yard sale or two. eventually, the little things added up. i was more enriched in life doing things than sitting at home in my little bubble. obviously, don’t say yes to everything, but if its safe and within your limits, why say no?

4) always learn.

ever since i was little, i feel like i have always been interested by learning new things. i’ve loved history since the day i could remember, and i often find myself watching a documentary every now and then about a subject that has caught my interest. but, it is also important to note that learning doesn’t necessarily mean reading a book or watching a documentary, you can learn by watching videos, by talking to people, by visiting a town or a museum or by simply asking a question.

5) in twenty years, it won’t matter.

as humans, we sometimes make a big deal out of the little things. like that one time when you said something stupid and everyone laughed and an hour later you’re still stressed about it? yeah well, everyone had already forgotten about it. and, remember that stupid fight you and a friend had and you think that its the end of the world? no, life will keep going on. in twenty years it won’t matter. in twenty years you won’t still stressing over that stupid embarrassing joke you said in front of some friends in the ninth grade, and believe it or not, that fight you had with your friend really won’t mean everything to you anymore. sometime a few months ago i was scrolling through all of the emails i had sent the past eight years i’ve had my email and i was reading a few, just seeing what younger emily was saying. there was this one that i had sent to a friend and we were in some type of argument, i have no idea what it was about, why i was so mad or what even happened after that. i do remember that at that time i thought it was the worst thing ever and that i would be mad about it forever. now, i can’t even remember why it happened and the only reason i have any idea that argument happened is because i have proof of it. things change, and some things won’t dictate your entire future- just put it into perspective.

6) take time for yourself.

sometimes we get so caught up in life and trying to do things for others that we forget who we really need to take care of- us. you. yes, it is good to take care of other people and it can make you feel so good, but it feels even better knowing that you’ve taken care of yourself too. take an hour everyday to do things for you. find the time, find a day, try to find something to pamper yourself doing every once in a while; take a break to breathe and to relax and to better yourself. constant stress will do nothing but tear you down. instead of going crazy doing everything all at once, try to take it more step by step and you’ll see the differences in some time.

7) getting upset, won’t change anything.

i often think back on memories as a child and remember myself getting so utterly upset when things didn’t go my way. when i couldn’t eat what i wanted for dinner or something along those lines. and in the end, that didn’t change anything. in the end, i was upset and still not eating what i wanted for dinner, i was now upset and didn’t have that pack of gum. and it takes so much energy from you, getting upset over something like that and it doesn’t change the outcome of anything, so why do it? why get mad about something that you can’t change and use all this energy getting mad or upset when you could be focusing all that energy on something good or useful or even something to come up with a solution for the problem.

8) travel and experience.

for me, traveling is so important. you can learn so much from going to another country, and not just the obvious things like a new culture or a new language. you can learn what it’s like to have to do things a certain way, gain a new strength, a new mind set. travel and see the beauty of this world- from the tallest mountains to the deepest canyon. go and see it all. go and travel in the cities around you because there is history to be seen and learned about everywhere.

9) look for the good in it.

a lot of times, we look for the bad. i know that i always have a habit of doing this, all the time no matter what. but, i’ve started to take a second and really think about things. how bad is the fact that i just dropped my food on the ground? sure, i can’t exactly eat it anymore, but much much worse things could happen. so, look for the good. no, theres not good in every situation, but that doesn’t mean you have to focus just on that negative thing. focus on another good thing that happened during that day, and if you can’t find something make something good happen for yourself or someone else. even if that doesn’t work- it’s always a good thing that you’re alive for another day!!

10) you’re not alone.

we sometimes think we are, but we never are. we only let ourselves think that we are alone in this world.

xx,

emily

psa: by everything i said, i am generalizing situations and events. this by no means apply to everyone in every situation and in the end, it is my own opinion.

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